Tools and Practices

Generosity of spirit and love is as important as being generous with material things. But this practice can be lost in the day-to-day busyness of our lives. Are you fortunate enough to be loved by many in your life? Are you in a special relationship? Do you have children, parents, grandparents, or a relative or friend whose love makes a big difference in your life? Wouldn't that love you feel be a great gift to share with others? There are many for whom family gatherings, birthday parties, special celebrations with friends, and other occasions of the heart are difficult times.

Create a Gratitude Calendar in your datebook, email program, online calendar, social media profile, etc., and use it to remind yourself to say blessings. You might have a different focus each month:

It can be useful to rehearse an act of forgiveness by practicing visualization. This exercise is adapted from Robin Casarjian's Forgiveness: A Bold Choice for a Peaceful Heart. Take a few deep, relaxing breaths. Bring to mind a person with whom you are in conflict. Recall what the real issues behind this conflict are for you. Recall what you are feeling about this person. Recall what you feel is still workable for you in this relationship. Breathe in and feel the wholeness within your own being.

This is one of the most popular and accessible personal enrichment tools. Writing regularly in a journal encourages you to see life experiences and emotions more clearly, to better understand your own behavior, and explore your attitudes. Here are some journal exercises to get you started exploring love.

Giving is one way we express our love—to those close to us, to our neighbors, to animals and plants, and to the Earth. We are encouraged to be generous at certain times of year—holidays, birthdays, at year's end for tax deductions—but spiritual practices can help us make generosity an everyday activity.

People tend to think that creativity is a solitary endeavor, yet artists often talk about having a muse and the joy they experience creating for their loved ones. In ancient China it was said that it takes two to create a masterpiece: an artist who imagines something beautiful and a person who appreciates it.

To do your part in creating a masterpiece:

Hugh Prather, author of many books of spiritual reflections, considers the steps necessary for forgiveness in Morning Notes: 365 Meditations to Wake You Up. He concludes that "a judgmental feeling about another person is based on the same belief as my fear of making mistakes: I think what someone once did is more important than how the person is now."

Consider ways to extend your love to the living planet we call home, while renewing your relationship with nature, friends, and family. Coordinate rides with others going your way or take public transportation when possible. Eat locally-grown, fresh foods. It's a way to love your body and the environment. Begin or renew your commitment to recycling. Plant a tree. Create a garden of love and forgiveness.

What else can you do to honor yourself, the earth, and the rest of its fellow inhabitants?

In It's a Meaningful Life: It Just Takes Practice, Bo Lozoff shares a slogan used in his community: "You can do hard." Lozoff, the cofounder of the Human Kindness Foundation and its award-winning Prison Ashram Project, explains that in our times saying something is "too hard" allows us to give up without trying.

This hugging practice is recommended by Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh in his Plum Village Chanting and Recitation Book. It is a perfect ritual to do with the ones you love.